Scattered

So much and yet, sort of nothing going on these days. You know what I mean? It's two weeks before school starts again, two weeks before the ball drops and all hell breaks loose. There are so many things up in the air right now that I find I can't move forward with things that need to be done. It's frustrating. I like to be able to check things off of my to-do list.
Money. It's the bane of my existence and the main reason why I can't move forward. I have a great life. I know it. I have an amazing family (if somewhat loud at times), we have a house, food in the cupboards and opportunities, but always there is the monster hiding out - money, or lack thereof. As it stands right now, I can barely afford to go back to school and can't, AT ALL, afford to pay for child care. And after the end of this month, we are not guaranteed a paycheck. I am so tired of worrying about it.
In other news, lots of good things have been happening in the blogs I follow, babies have been born, babies are growing and getting better and babies are on the horizon. It's fun to see the frequent bloggers completely fall off the radar once their babies are here, I know what you're doing (and it ain't sleeping).
All in all, I've had a good summer. My trip was amazing and by far the best part of the four months (that long???) I've had off, but now the reality of back-to-school looms and I wonder if this is what I'm cut out for. I keep thinking, I could be a paramedic out east, living in a small house by the sea with friendly neighbours, horses and room to run.
But I can't pass up this opportunity, so we'll see how my first midwifery placement goes. It still seems so surreal that the new year will mean *I* will be helping to deliver babies (what were they thinking?).
In the meantime, I'm going to do lots of sitting, because once September hits, I won't have the time to.