It's been a long time since I blogged anything. I guess I worry. I worry about this amorphous mass known as the internet, full of piranhas you can't even imagine.
But there are things that I need to say. I'm on a journey here that I'd like to share. And also I want to reciprocate. I read other blogs, yet share nothing of myself. So here goes.
I'm going to be a midwife.
It was never on my radar, never crossed my mind and yet, it's where I'm meant to be. My Mother always said "The Lord works in mysterious ways". I always thought of it as that little bit in a movie or show that seemed out of place but made sense at the end.
I wanted to be a doctor, to heal, to learn about cool things like anatomy. Too bad I was such a procrastinator when I was doing my first degree, or was that one of the out-of-place snippets popping up?
I had my babies with midwives, they were amazing. They gave me an idea, midwifery is medicine, although thankfully not as staid and unopen as the regular system. Why not try for midwifery school? Somehow, somehow I got in.
Today I've been reading blogs of women who had stillbirths. I am awed by their strength, their grace. I pray pray pray I am never at such a birth, but the possibility is there. I read these blogs that make me weep all over my keyboard to learn from these women, to find empathy, so I can comprehend even a tiny fraction of how that must feel. But, oh God, if it hurts me this much, how do they survive? It must be a miracle.
1 comment:
Your presence as an informed midwife would make a tremendous difference to a woman who experiences a stillbirth. I hope that what you have learned from reading the blogs of women who have suffered losses would allow you to help.
I have read stories - aurelia's being one of them - of women who were dumped by their midwives when things went wrong. You cannot prevent all loses but you can be supportive.
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